Well, It's SOMETHING to do...

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Eighteen-year-old Scott Harper wanted to see what would happen if he jumped off the upper deck at Yankee Stadium and ended up looking like an ASS.
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I went on a hiking trip once and while struggling around some really big rocks, I ran into a battered hiker. When I said, "Good morning!", he responded, "Dah!"

Turns out he was part of a visiting team of Russian climbers who had gotten lost on a nearby peak. Helicopters and planes had been flying over my campsite for the past 18 hours and now I knew why. Seeing the condition they were in, I was grateful that the state's Search and Rescue crew got the climbers to safety, but there was a big argument over whether the Russians should have to pay the state back. I don't know how that turned out, but I sort of thought that's why we have Search and Rescue services...for helping people who are in physical peril.

But Runaway Bride Jennifer Wilbanks (or as the New York Post calls her, the "bug-eyed bolter") wasted a shitload of tax payer dollars with her lies and stupidity and in return, the State of Georgia is extracting its pound of flesh. No doubt the appearance of reporters today as she started her community service caused great humiliation. Of course, if she decides not to show up for the rest of her 120 hours, she could just blame her absence on another mythical carjacking by a dirty Mexican.

Oh and by the way, she and her fiancee are still registered at Pottery Barn.