Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Being President Isn't Rocket Science (Apparently)

No wonder John Kerry didn't release his grades from Yale until just now. He graduated with a whopping 76% average (that's a "C") while George W. squeaked past him with a 77%. Kerry's highest grade was on a political science project -- and he only got a B+! For crying out loud! Well, at least they had good life skills: Bush managed to be born into a rich and powerful family while Kerry chose a billionaire wife the second time around. Looks like 2004 was more evenly matched than any of us might have believed.

Makes you wonder why Bill Clinton did all that studying, scored a Rhodes scholarship, graduated from Yale Law School, read one book a week for years at a time. What was he thinking? He could have been attending keggers, joining a secret fraternity, leading cheers. . . and STILL have become President. What a waste of good leisure time.

Let this be a lesson to all those overachievers: It's a Slacker Nation, so grab your beer bong and PAR-TAY! WOO-HOO! You can plan your campaign later.

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